Sense & Nonsense

Life revolved only around my thesis ever since we got married…

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My sister gave me an idea - using graphics to narrate my feelings rather than lengthy sentences. Though I’m not good with drawing caricatures and cartoons, below is the best I could produce using Paint. Haha..

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Industrial Technology Night 2008 or TI Night 2008 in short finally came knocking on our doorstep. Held in CITITEL, Penang on the 14th of March 2008, the event proceeded smoothly as scheduled (never mind the Malaysian time) as the night began to warm and heat up. Before the big day, I guess our TI techies especially the ladies were buzzing about, focusing in full swing towards the preparation and comparing notes on what to wear from make up to shoes, hair and apparels. Everybody wanted to appear their best and maybe somewhere inside tried to outdo each other. I believe a lot of money, blood and sweat were sacrificed in the name of beauty. Nevertheless “vanity thy name is always woman” but with the growing number of metrosexuals in this sensitive new age era, it also applies to men. Most of our costumes apparently did not really fulfill the theme “Colours of Life” as the majority were garbed in black (the usual colour to look slim), other dark colours (also for the slimming effect) and white. As always, most of the guys were spotted with the regular attire (shirt, tie and trousers/slacks and coat) minus the exceptional few. Usually the ladies would be the ones grabbing all the attention and spot light because we were forever blessed with the choice for “variations”. This is one of the joys for being a woman. But all I can say is that night, the lasses were looking pretty, elegant, gorgeous and BOLD in their gowns, flaunting their prized assets with pride and glory. So what happened to ugly duckling here? Well, she wore only a simple short brown dress with her tresses let down loose the natural way, applied a reasonable amount of make up to hide flaws and she made her entrance. Talking about the agenda line up, we had lucky draws (how I wish I was the lucky one), ballroom dancing where a certain couple attracted some oohs and aahs from the “curious” audience, performances such as singing, band music, belly dancing with the sexy swaying and hip hop / break dancing (two thumbs up for the flipping and somersaulting) while not forgetting the most essential part - “makan time”. Overall, it was a night for celebrities. Throughout the affair even after the show was over, the cameras went wild, clicking away even as you make a 360 degrees turn while being planted on the same spot and people went table hopping, flashing their Colgate smiles cum sparkling teeth at the same time, striking numerous styles of poses to satisfy the hunger of the self employed paparazzi. Another event not to be missed was the nomination of the Prom King and Queen. Couples were selected from the crowd and were made to perform some tasks before the winners were finally crowned. For this part, the joker and clown from the Food Technology division (who else.. Phuah Eng Tong lor..) and his selected partner for the night took the much coveted title. His comical speech, antics and expression tickled almost everyone to tears during the little sketch which they had to perform. From my speculation maybe because of this too, he clinched the “Best Personality” award other than being tall, having a good build, tanned and self claimed handsome. Haha…Alas, Cinderalla’s time was up when everybody was enjoying themselves. We had to leave not because of being afraid that our outfits would transform back into rags smeared with cinder, but it’s because our ballroom rental period had reached its limit unless we decide to pay a little more. Still in the party mood, the ball shifted position with some of us heading towards the clubs nearby for another round of merriment. However, judging by the whole scenario from the beginning to the end, the theme for the night was accomplished after all. We did not have to be dressed up resembling a rainbow to bring out the colours of life. All we needed were the presence and laughters of an army of people, accompanied by a melting pot of idiosyncrasies to ignite and spark the vibrant colours of our existence as one BIG unit of family (Food + Wood + Environment Tech ) in the School of Industrial Technology.

The clock like a steadfast metronome is ticking meticulously. By right, I should be raging wars against time especially to try milking out the 60-80 pages of thesis from a dehydrated brain. Unfortunately laziness got the better of me. I have been procrastinating work lately because I just don’t know where and how to start. After spending almost three years in USM, graduation day is finally approaching (which I’m not really keen.) I’ve experienced different stages of life in the university starting from freshman to my senior year. The vivid image of the day I stepped into USM as a blur, nerdy, confused newbie with great anticipation and motivated resolutions is still visible in my mind as it seemed only like yesterday (the difference is that the motivation had diminished), then turning into a seasoned second year student who got comfortable with life (got "wiser" after being accustomed to certain "loop holes" to scavenge my way around) and now a final year student being besieged by the project and triply slaughtered by the unfinished thesis, assignments and tests. Even physical appearance had now become trivial thus it had completely deteriorated (bravo to the dark circles, blotchy puffy face and the ever popping pimples) right from the very day the laboratory work was officially launched. No more make-up and playing dress up. Just cladded in loose T-shirt and jeans, hair pinned up and fastened like an "old aunty" for ease and simplicity and its time to move. According to my sister, that’s the regular trend (maybe not all..) observed from university students. (First year - nerdy and disciplined, Sophomore and junior years - Pheuweee…eet, stunning and gorgeous, Final year -old, nerdy and dishevelled). It’s not to say that I did go through the "gorgeous and stunning phase" during my sophomore year because basically from the beginning I’m just a plain ugly duckling. So you might be wondering why I’m complaining so much about looking hideous during my third year since I never was and not even once morphed into a swan. Well, I can’t help it. It’s just that ugly duckling got uglier. For me, the trend is - First year - ugly, nerdy duckling, second year - the best I could achieve was a mandarin duck, and third year - uglier, nerdier duckling. This is so pathetic but these are the facts that I must unravel though it is depressing! Reverting back to about to graduate soon is much much more demoralising. There are no clear goals. I enjoy student life so much that I despise having to scout for a job in the competitive market. Yeah.. scold me for sounding like a spoilt brat. I’m actually torn between taking up a masters programme (which field???) or focus on accumulating working experience and filling up my pockets while I’m still at my peak. Right now, I am petrified with issues of being jobless and useless in the future. If I were to question "Who is going to feed me if I am unemployed???? ", the common sarcastic answer I would get is "Go find a rich husband!". Duh… job hunting is already a headache and a chore. Reaching out for a capable, rich and accountable husband is more like a stubborn donkey still insisting to look for a microorganism with a naked eye. Sometimes I really wonder if ugly duckling here will ever stumble upon its happily ever after in all matters…… Argh….

As I passed through the corridors of my hostel, there was this perculiar looking creature assembling itself near the pantry. At first I ignored it, but I turned back. By the look of that patchy fuzzy thing, initially it seemed to have a confused and puzzled expression. With its ears twitching and green goblin’s eyes occasionally rolling, it then started to gaze at me. I gave it a long hard stare, shooting daggers and exchanging lasers. The longer I stared, I was fixed to the ground. That thing also did not budge but continued to sit and stare. Frozen and still, we were like playing the "Who can stare the longest without winking" game. With calm and cool creatures like this, I lost. In the midst of the competition, I suspected that the smart "fella" was trying to hypnotise me - food, food, give me food. Then I knew, he was actually eyeing that little package clutched in between my fingers. Gotcha. Huh! Sorry dude. You lose. I threw that empty package into the dustbin and walked away. Muahahahaha.. too bad I wasn’t fond of THE furry beast. What I saw was a cat! Bah.. Not my fur ball of animal.

The gentle morning sun shyly peeked in between the curtains into my little bedroom corner. Sparrows were chirping merrily outside of my window, welcoming the new day. OH.. SHUT UP!!! Woke up with a foul mood today. I must have got up at the wrong side of the bed. Being late for the early morning class did not help to elevate the mood either. (Ok.. waking up late was my fault). Then my favourite bathroom cubicle being hogged by some sloth made me angrier. I felt like I was waiting for an hour over the other side of the door. Somewhere inside me wanted to kick open the door and say "Time’s up b*!+(h" Fortunately she was saved by the ticking clock. I decided to use the other not so favourite cubicle. I sound irrational.. but that’s how I am - BAD MOOD!! It’s already 8.10 am and class starts at 8 am. From past experience, for once I thought that I might be able to make it  (though I’ll be 20 minutes late.. better to show up rather than never) since the 7.30 - 8.00 am peak hour was over. How wrong was I. Bus after bus, they came and went but not stopping to pick up people at the IK bus stop. The waiting crowd soon expanded and proliferated similar to my colonies of bacteria on my culture media over the waiting area but still no bus wanted to stop for us because they were already filled with people from the RST hostels. Five buses were lining up over at the RST stop but none came for us. Damn! That was so unfair. It was as though we did not pay for our bus service fees until they had to boycott us here. Hello! We paid the same amount of money yet we are being ill-treated like this?? Some "good" hearted people began giving excuses for them by commenting that those people at the RST hostels are staying a little "further" away from us ("poor" things).. but duh… they didn’t pay extra for the bus fare, did they? In desperate times like this, I’m sorry too say that my heart certainly has no room for compassion. Come on, 5 buses or more over there and zero for us. Too much! Where’s the rationality??? !!! Out of frustration, I wondered what have our rhetorical student council representatives done for us? The bus woes had been going on for centuries, election after election, promises after bullshit promises yet, they were still unsolved. Cursing under my breath, I paced up and down and  occasionally glanced at my watch. My god, it was already 8.45am. Class would be over anytime. When I looked up, I saw another bus which was about to arrive at our station. It was the same bus driver who bypassed us just 15 minutes ago. This was his second round of fetching. He waved to us (yeah…I thought.. finally he decided to step on the brakes). I was horrified when he was not gesturing for us to board the bus but telling us that he’s not stopping because the bus was.. (need I say more?) FULL! Again???!! What the heck! This was truly pissing me off. Subsequently, familiar faces of bus drivers slowly driving pass us became a common sight. This time, the fact of being personal transport handicap began to eat me up, gnawing deeper into my tissues and muscles almost reaching the bones. Every motorists who scoot and zoom by snobbishly,inflated with pride (that was what they looked like at that moment…. ) while leaving us behind  became an irritating scene. A few bloody "show offs" then started to cruise by super slowly near us with their Peroduas, Protons or whatsoever, turning to look at us with fascinating eyes and sneering expressions on their faces as though we were like some helpless animals from Taman Safari. I couldn’t help but felt that they were deliberatingly mocking us. So dude, if you are not picking us up, get lost or I’ll gorge your eyeballs out! SHOO!!! Finally at 9.05 am, a semi-filled bus decided to spare us some space in the bus. Everyone was elbowing their way through like always. Yes. Class was over. You might be wondering why I kept on waiting for yours truly -THE BUS when there was certainly no hope of making a "grand" appearance into the lecture hall, getting dagger stares from the lecturer and having friends inching their legs inner to make way for me to reach an empty seat. Well, I still had some work in the laboratory and was supposed to go shopping with friends after that. Unfortunately the rude morning experience left me overboiled, moody and lazy. After finishing my business, I decided to go back to my room for slumberland. Luckily, the morning episode of bus waiting ordeal did not repeat itself on my way back. By then, I had already cooled down. Exhausted and staring tiredly out from the bus window as the rectangular vehicle began to move, I made my journey back to Indah Kembara, my happily ever after - to zzzzzzzzzzzzzZZZZZZZZZz.

"Thousands of people live in this town
And I had to run into him
When I saw him there on that busy street
Those feelings came back again
There was nowhere to run, nowhere to hide
He walked up to me, looked in my eyes

And still
The world stood still
I couldn’t move
And all I could feel
Was this aching in my heart
Saying I loved him still"

-lyrics from "And Still" by Reba McEntire-

Beautiful, touching song by Reba McEntire but I don’t think that it’ll be that beautiful when stuck in sticky situations like this. Anyway, to all of you out there no matter whether you are single or attached, enjoy cupid’s day. LOVE is to be shared and experienced by all. Cherish whomever is around you because you’ll never miss the water until it really runs dry. Happy Valentine’s Day!

"When darkness falls upon your heart and soul.
I’ll be the light that shines for you.
When you forget how beautiful you are
I’ll be there to remind you.
When you can’t find your way,
I’ll find my way to you.
When troubles come around,
I will come to you.

I’ll be your shoulder when you need someone to lean on.
Be your shelter.
When you need someone to see you through.
I’ll be there to carry you.
I’ll be there.
I’ll be the rock that will be strong for you.
The one that will hold on to you.
When you feel that rain falling down.
When there’s nobody else around.
I’ll be."

-lyrics from the song "I’ll Be" by Reba McEntire-

(=^_^=) Let peace be with all of us…

The following post began on one fine ‘mou liu’ day……..

Ever used sounds to substitute verbs in your daily conversation? Well folks, this is not an English lesson about using correct grammar because the advocates of proper English would be horified if they ever come across this. I think this is only applicable for Manglish. Below are some examples:

1. A mother asked her little son of 3 years, "Do you want to go "she she" ?" Translation: "she she" means urinate (I guess that’s the sound of our jet spraying urea solution which we usually hear when we urinate…)

2. I bet this may also sound familiar to you. Have you ever heard of mothers telling their young ones (or your mother telling you when you were a kid =^_^= ) "Go to the toilet to "erm..erm"? There are even mothers telling their babies "erm..erm" to induce and increase the rate of excretion while they are sitting on the potty. Translation: "erm..erm" means to pass motion or to go shit (I don’t know why the sound "erm..erm". Sounds like someone’s constipated and struggling during bowel movement. Maybe the word "to shit" is too crude for the young ones to hear or "to pass motion" is too complicated and long for the young ones.)

3. I’m going to the bank to "tit tit" money. Translation: "tit tit" means to withdraw money via the ATM machine. (Probably that’s the sound produced when we press on the ATM machine’s buttons while doing our transactions)

4. The pail fell and "kong" his head. Translation: "kong" means knock. (Ouch.. that must be mighty painful to produce such a sound)

5. The gun trigger went off and that fellar kena "PIANG". Translation: fellar kena "PIANG" means the person was shot.

6. "You better keep your mouth shut or I will "BISHA" (sometimes "DUSH") you!" Translation: Seen action movies especially Bollywood movies during the bashing up, fist fighting or boxing scenes? I think you’ll know what "BISHA" & "DUSH" mean.

7. "Aiyo.. phak thor oredi (means have been dating or courting) for so long, when are both of you going to "Teng teng teng teng" (according to the melody of "Here comes the bride.." from the Wedding March)?" Translation: "Teng teng teng teng" means getting married. (Maybe its the sound of the piano playing the Wedding March)

8. Suddenly, I heard someone "poo…oot". Translation : "poo..oot" means fart. (Need I say more? That’s the regular sound we usually hear when someone "releases gas". There also may be other various sounds unless someone releases the "silent killer")

9. "I was so tired like siao (extremely tired) and I terus "korr..hk.." (I don’t know how to put this sound into alphabets.. but that is the sound produced when someone snores). Translation: "korr..hk.." means sleep.

That is about all the examples that I can think of right now. Will update more later when I hear more sounds substituting verbs. Hehe…

p/s: Feeling  really ‘mou liu’ right now, so things like this started to bug me. Therefore I decided to write this piece of crap in my virtual space to satisfy my ‘mou liu-ness’. Pardon me…

Oh.. and if you notice the date of my post .. it’s Valentine’s Day = Singles’ Awareness Day (as my friend puts it for us singles).. Hahaha.. No wonder I’m feeling ‘mou liu’….

        I had witnessed a few subsequent theft cases which happenned to the people arround me. Even I fell victim to such a terrible tragedy. When I came back from lunch, I discovered that my shabby bag pack,left outside the microbiology laboratory was no where to be seen. Initially, I thought that I must have misplaced it because I’m kind of absent minded these days OR some idiot was playing a darn mean joke even though it wasn’t April Fool. However, not long it finally hit me - MY bag must have been stolen by some unknown ding dong bell!!!! Damn it! What luck!!

         Immediately, my friend and I started opening up dustbins and searched the whole building except for the men’s toilet. Under such tensed condition, I was ready to barge into the gent’s to catch and bash up the possible thief but somehow something refrained me from doing so because I might end up being bashed up and sued instead for being a pervert if I were to storm in when someone was doing his business in the exposed urinal bowl. At one point, I also thought that the bastard must have desperately thrown my bag into the elevator shaft as the lift broke down coincidentally. So I remained close by, hopefully waiting for the repair man to fish out my lost bag but it was a piece of plastic he found which caused the jam.

     Honestly, I was really overwhelmed with mixed emotions - shock, mad and boiling hot, sometimes I don’t even know whether to laugh or cry. But I created a big hoo haa and was cursing and swearing at whoever who stole my bag during the whole search. Well… the news of my missing bag must have spread like wild fire as no bags were sighted outside the other laboratories after that. Everyone became cautious and grabbed their belongings into the labs where they were working.

       Shortly, after engaging help from a guy friend to scavenge the men’s loo, miraculously he found my bag sitting on the floor near the wash basin but with the zips all openned. Fortunately, nothing was stolen because there were no valuables which concerned the daylight robber! In the bag, there were only the "cacat-ted’ umbrella, 70 cents, water bottle, pencil case, my essential lab coat which was already tainted with God knows what bacteria and etc. Maybe in the eyes of the others they may be trivial, but to me they are priceless as you see, I have this attachment problem with my possesions. Later, I found out that my friend’s bag also went missing and it wasn’t found until after a week or two in the men’s toilet again.

         Though my lost bag re-emerged, the anguish moments of shock still lingered. Then I began to think. A few days before, I encountered with a man who dropped and lost his wallet. Two days later, my friend’s wallet was stolen by professional pick pockets at the Sungai Dua night market. The tactic used was by intensely crowding around and pushing us while in the midst, one of them skillfully picked my friend’s pocket. When we felt that something was amissed, we turned around and accused the guy right behind us for stealing. The f#*K!nG pretender kept denying and turned defensive while his suspected co-thief acted surprised and shocked at our misfortune. We were quite sure that he must be the ONE who took my friend’s wallet because what business does he have for standing less than an inch close to us so suddenly.Though our sixth sense positively pin pointed that guy, we couldn’t possibly asked him to strip. By the way, the smart ass might have passed the wallet to his team mate who disappeared and blended into the crowd within split seconds. Reluctantly, we had to let him go.

         All these incidences happened around the same week and I’m not sure if it’s just pure coincidence. The worst part faced was when we reported the stolen wallet  to the police. Already our mood was badly affected, we were still infiltrated with silly questions such as - what is the purpose of reporting the stolen wallet, do you know (which appropriately should be "recognize") that person and where he stays??? Come on… we reported the case because it was our social duty to do so and it is THEIR police duty to catch those useless S.O.B’s and recover our stolen belongings. Don’t tell me I reported because I was eager to contribute to the statistics for stolen properties?? Plus, if we knew where that thief stays (may God bless him), we would have burned his house down for robbing us without bothering to wait for the troublesome, time consuming, legal professional action. Geez… How could we not be angry??!!! Damn.

Yeah it’s the New Year. Year 2007 has gone and 2008 is here. To me it’s just another plain old day. There’s nothing really new, just ordinary. In fact problems emerged so, it certainly isn’t a “Happy” New Year but a disappointing one when what was intended did not fall into place. So how did I celebrate the welcoming of 2008? First the internet connection at my hostel had gone bonkers. So, there was no internet to entertain myself. S%!+ On the eve itself, besides trying to whack a lost cockroach seen prowling around my room, I was stuck trying to get friendly with my would be “pets” which I’m going to rear and kill later, busy preparing “homes” and “nutritious food” to feed them in the microbiology laboratory. The Year 2008 isn’t even the year of the Cow, yet my next agenda was to spend the eve and the New Year chasing and sprinting after local live mama cows. I’m not a freak obsessed over these milk producing mammals but I have no choice but to be obsess right now as I need their products for my project. I’m desperate! My partner and I had been searching high and low for accessible local dairy farms around the island and being personal transport handicap and geographically blind isn’t of any help. All I am armed with is my project partner, inconvenient public transportation, “bus Number 11” (my pair of legs for walking) and poor sense of direction. When we thought everything was moving smoothly, suddenly a great enormous blow landed straight onto our faces. The man which was supposed to provide us with that precious milk dropped the atomic bomb - he sold ALL his cows and now he has no milk. Of all days, we received this “splendid present” on New Year’s Day. What the hack! I was dumbfounded when I was told the news. Damn it! Felt like strangling him and then MAYBE SUDDENLY *poof* the cows he sold (which I suspect is already on someone’s dinner plate or possibly out and bobbing OR drowned in the pool of Indah Water’s septic tank) would miraculously come running home to provide us with their raw milk. I know it’s impossible to bring back those sold or probably dead cows but I can’t help it but wish and wish and drop on my knees and pray that they would come back. We are already at our wits end and now this!!!! @#$%^&&**) GREAT!! ….duh!